Before you can post or reply in these forums, please join our online community. I don't know where else to go with this, Im married but in love with someone else I feel like my current situation is eating me up and I'm so tired of it. I recently rekindled a friendship with my first love. We are both married and have admitted our feelings for each other. He has told me he is insanely in love with me. We tried cutting off in order to work on our respective marriages but that only lasted about a month.
If anything, I
Im married but in love with someone else even more depressed during the time we weren't talking, like something significant was missing in life. I am so unhappy in my marriage and sick and tired.
Sick and tired of us just not "clicking", living like room mates and feeling like there is no emotional or physical connection. He is more like my best friend, which some people say is essential to a marriage but then why do I feel like it's not enough?
My husband is a great guy and he is the first person I go to for advice and support with my mental health. I'm not even sure if I could get the same thing from this other guy.
I feel so selfish and like a bad person for feeling this way. I have been questioning whether I am just infatuated with the other guy. I truly am blind when it comes to him, and feel like he is a drug. Can infatuation turn into long lasting love I wonder I have never felt this way about
Im married but in love with someone else before, not even my husband. I was in my mids when I married him and he was my first. I fee like Im married but in love with someone else should have gotten more life experience before making a decision like that.
At the time though, I'd been broken hearted and decided that truly being in love only led to heartache and instead I would marry someone that ticked the boxes.
Yes I have thought about leaving my husband. But I'm terrified about the logistics aswell as the perception of me especially by my conservative family. Also I have had moderate-severe
But in the meantime, any advice or relatable experiences would be so Im married but in love with someone else appreciated. Hello Lookingforpeace, it sounds like you feel you're going round in circles like this, I wonder whether it's worth actually making a Pros and Cons list on either side of a piece of paper so you can see the potential consequences of leaving vs staying in black and white in front of you.
It may not help a great deal, but writing it out in that way may help you see that one side is more weighted than the other.
I can relate to getting married young, I did the same and we are no longer together. I loved him very much, but throughout our marriage I had a few infatuations are exactly as you describe above. I know that noneo f mine would have worked out, and in hindsight I can see that it was more of a dissatisfaction with my life rather than an attraction to the other man that was mixing me up.
Can I ask - were you in a long Im married but in love with someone else relationship after your first husband and did you ever experience infatuations Im married but in love with someone else during that relationship? Also, though you loved your first husband, how did you find strength to leave despite that? I too love and care for husband very much and don't want to hurt him or ruin his ideas of the life we thought we would have.
I feel that you may have hit the nail on the head when you said it may have been more of a dissatisfaction with life that was spurring the infatuations. Although I also can't help but wonder whether it just might work out with this other guy. We are so alike and connect on a level I've never experienced Im married but in love with someone else. I'm yet to be in another long-term relationship, but the relationships I have been in Im married but in love with someone else have started to evolve.
The relationships I chose not long after the marriage were unhealthy choices based around the types of men I had been infatuated with up till that point. I think we can in these situations have a bit of 'confirmation bias' happening - we only recognise the similarities, and choose toignore the potential red flags.
Maybe they are worth a pros and cons list too! That's why I suggest that being single for a time could be the best idea. I don't think it's ever a good idea to jump straight into a new relationship out of an old one.
How did I find the strength to leave? Well, we actually danced around it for the best part of a year. I announced that I was going to leave, but I don't think he took it seriously until the day I actually did.
I think I finally realised that any reasons I had for staying were based in the past and not in how things actually were in the prsent, or could bei n the future. The end of a relationship is a lot like grief, I think, with the difference being that the death of a person forces you to move on, whereas in a relationship breakdown you can delude yourself into thinking that there is still a chance for things to be like they were.
Can I ask you something? Did you feel the same 'rush' with your husband when you first met him as you did with your first love? I too rekindled twice with my first boyfriend. I think it's true that we never forget our first love. If you were to 'go back' to first love, how long would it be before you realized he really isn't what you remembered.
My first boyfriend too was my first 'true' love. I was 15, he was You can't Im married but in love with someone else 'young' forever. Your husband has been there for you, you said yourself. I think you should give your marriage another 'go'.
From what you say, I feel it is infatuation. Why did you and first love split? Once you get there, permanently, it isn't so green. Think about what you have and how much you'll lose. Affairs sound 'peaches and cream' in theory, but the hurt you cause, is it worth it? If you did leave and go with boyfriend, how long before the original reason you split rears it's head again?
I nearly broke up my marriage for first boyfriend, too. Glad I sent him packing. He simply wasn't worth it. Thank you for your reply. It's nice to hear from someone who has been through a similar situation. I hope I can come out of it the way you did - what seems like with clarity and knowing you made the right decision. At the moment though I just feel very confused. I don't want to lose my husband, but this whole experience has made me realise it may be possible to love more than one person.
I'm trying to remind myself that things have worked out the way they have for a reason, but it's hard to get comfort from that when I don't know what the reason is. My first boyfriend and I broke Im married
Im married but in love with someone else in love with someone else for immature reasons, I was 14 and he was Getting to know him again is making me fall in love again. We have the history but on top of that we are alike and I feel such a strong connection.
I feel happy when I'm with him. I wish I didn't get my happiness from being with other people,
Im married but in love with someone else I do, and I am happy with him. I KNOW what the right thing to do is. But I still can't help myself. I can't help but feel you and first boyfriend only have a connection because of past.
As I asked previously, when you first met Im married but in love with someone else, what did you feel, was it the same 'rush'. Try comparing boyfriend to hubby. Would boyfriend have 'been there' if you needed him? Hubby was, you said yourself. I would suggest you distance yourself from boyfriend for a time, see how you feel. Try and recapture what you and hubby had. Maybe a time away with hubby.
I think you're 'in Im married but in love with someone else with a memory. I know when I reconnected with boyfriend it was because of him being first love. I see Jess has suggested a trial separation from hubby, Im married but in love with someone else you should think about that. Please don't do anything hastily. There are two important lives here, you and hubby. Why did bf's marriage break up?
You said his marriage broke up. Yes I think you might be right. When I get space from both my husband and boyfriend, I feel quite certain that I should stay in my marriage and cut things off with the boyfriend.
But then talk to him again and I'm back to square one. No I didn't get the same rush with my now husband.
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What To Do When You Are Married But In Love With Someone Else
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What to do when you meet your soulmate after your marriage to another person.
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What am I doing on this website?If you are married, and have found that you have fallen in love with someone else , this article is for you. Here is some advice for this difficult situation. What to do when you are married but in love with another person. What to do when you want to have an affair or cheat on your husband, wife, or spouse..
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